


Kiss Me Thoughtless

by sleeplittlechild



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-21
Updated: 2016-06-21
Packaged: 2018-07-16 12:36:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7268518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleeplittlechild/pseuds/sleeplittlechild
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Magnus's thoughts during that memorable kiss scene.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kiss Me Thoughtless

**Author's Note:**

> I know it's been months since THE kiss - I wanted to write this a long time ago...I just got really lazy.
> 
> I hope you will like it.

Magnus moved through the halls of the Institute, his magic leading him to Clary. All of Ragnor's possessions laid in the back of his mind, ready to be summoned at a moment's notice.They could be just a step closer to saving Jocelyn and he could be one step further from the Nephilim. Magnus pushed that thought out of his mind as he rounded the corner.

_Oh._

Right.

The Wedding.

Admist the black and white and gold Magnus felt like a great target in his maroon jacket and pink hair. Just this great sense of otherness, amplified now more than any other interactions he had with the Shadowhunters. Hundreds of eyes stared at him, including a beautiful pair of hazel.

Alexander, handsome and stunning Alexander, standing at the altar with the equally (well, almost equally) lovely Lydia. Their hands held together with a stele between them. Magnus couldn't see how completed the rune was and his chest grew tight at the thought of those swirls permanently etched on Alexander's skin. Binding him to a woman forever.

Not that Alec's life was his burden anymore, Magnus reminded himself. He told Alec he would not ask to stop this again. He would not put himself in the open, no matter what Ragnor ('s ghost, himself, Magnus's hallucinations – whatever) said. He would not stretch out his hand to save Alec when Alec didn't want it. He would not, he would not.

“Magnus, leave this wedding now.” Maryse, in all her soldier stature, strode towards him.

“Maryse, this is between me and your son.” Magnus cast her aside with one finger.

“I'll leave if he asks me to.”

Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it, but let this happen. Maybe watching Alec throw him out of his own wedding would wake him out of this stupor.

As the moment stretched longer and longer, Magnus steeled himself. He hid behind his walls, trying desperately to remember and forget of Camille. Of Imasu. Of Etta. Of all the loves he'd had that case him away. He hardened the mask he loved to wear as he watched Alec and Lydia whisper. Lydia reached out to cup his cheek, gentleness in every touch. And then Alec was looking at him. Staring him down with determination.

This was the end of whatever could have been.

Those hard eyes – so filled with hazel. Looking like opals, flickers of all sorts of colors – so many emotions. Magnus felt all the fight fly out of him. He stood with his arms limp at his side. His mask was cracked and as Alec marched to him, Magnus knew his rejection – this very last rejection – would be the one to break him completely. And Magnus, as he always would, would let it. There had been nobody before Alec and there would be nobody after him.

Alec grabbed him by his lapels and they kissed.

It took Magnus by surprised and another moment for him to respond. His hands trembled and somehow, the only thing that stopped them was gripping Alec's waist, hard. He squeezed the gold threads, trying to calm his racing heart.

The kiss ended, but Magnus's spinning head wasn't finished. He followed, chasing Alec's lips. He wasn't ready for this to end, now that he'd had a taste. Magnus didn't want Alec to wake up, to realize what and where he was. To leave Magnus behind and hide again. And if he could keep Alec with him for just one more second, he wanted to. Whether for him or the Shadowhunter, who the hell cared.

But then Alec was leaning close to him again. Magnus smiled, the smallest giggle bubbling out of him before they kissed again.

For a closeted man, oh could Alec kiss. He drank Magnus in and Magnus was an unending well. Whatever Alec wanted Magnus would give – he only had to ask. All of his ancient years became the archer's in that one wonderful kiss.

So many new kisses that he could show passed through Magnu's mind and he gripped Alec's jacket tighter to keep himself standing.

Things couldn't last forever and Magnus and Alec parted slowly, to savor this wonderful feeling. They breathed and Magnus saw the tension seep out of Alec's body. Oh, how he wished that he could keep them in this moment. This moment that Alec created. “You never cease to amaze me, Alec.”

“Yeah.” Alec breathed out and that gentle voice was a long time coming. But Magnus could see his eyes – that beautiful, beautiful hazel – cleared like coming out of a dream. “What did I just do?”

 


End file.
